When time stands still
Doing one thing well
I used to go on vacation loaded down with equipment. Not only did I pack my golf clubs and bathing suit, I filled a suitcase with books, camera equipment, watercolors and charcoal pencils, knitting, and other items with which to fill any free time. I was raised to see “wasting time” as a character flaw. Every moment was supposed to be used for something “useful.”
我过去常带着大量的装备去度假。不仅把高尔夫球杆和游泳衣打包好，还把书、摄影器材、水彩画和炭笔、编织和其他可以用来打发空闲时间的东西装进了手提箱。我从小就认为“浪费时间”是一种性格缺陷。每一刻都应该被用来做一些“有用的”事情。
Several years ago, however, my husband and I had the privilege of spending some time on the North Shore of Kauai, one of the most beautiful spots on the planet, in a condo with a breathtaking view of Hanalei Bay and the overhanging cliffs, the waterfalls, and pounding surf. Surfers glided down the faces of the waves; green turtles and whales appeared beyond the breakers. One afternoon I settled in on the lanai with a cold drink, a book, and my sketching materials, but found myself captivated by the shifting light and dancing water. When I finally looked up, more than an hour had passed—and it had seemed like only a few seconds.
然而，几年前，我和我的丈夫有幸住在考艾岛的北岸的一套公寓里——地球上最美丽的地方之一，在那里可以看到哈纳雷湾(Hanalei Bay)、悬崖峭壁、瀑布和汹涌的海浪。冲浪者在海浪面上滑行; 绿色的海龟和鲸鱼出现在浪花之外。一天下午，我喝了一杯冷饮，拿了一本书，拿了一些素描材料，在拉奈河上安顿下来。当我最终抬起头时，已经过去了一个多小时，而那似乎只有几秒钟。
At that moment, I felt guilty for “wasting time.” But in the years since, as I’ve developed a mindfulness and yoga practice, I’ve learned how important it is to simply be, without distractions—to sit and breathe and be fully present wherever I am. Now I can’t imagine my life without those precious moments of “wasted time.”
那一刻，我为“浪费时间”而感到内疚。“但从那以后的几年里，我逐渐培育出了一种正念和练习瑜伽的习惯，明白了保持简单、不分心是多么重要——无论我在哪里，都要坐着、呼吸、全身心投入。”现在我无法想象我的生活中没有那些宝贵的“浪费时间”的时刻。
For too many people in the 21st century, however, it’s not enough to accomplish one task at a time. Instead, we’ve learned to “multitask”—and we’re proud of it. We talk on our wireless device while driving to work. We keep up with the national news while checking email. We talk to our children while cooking dinner, and help with the homework while folding the laundry. We go out to dinner with our partner but wind up answering text messages over the salad. There is always so much to do, and never enough time in which to do it.
然而，对21世纪的许多人来说，一次完成一项任务是不够的。相反，我们学会了“多任务处理”，并为此感到自豪。我们开车上班时用无线设备通话；一边查看电子邮件，一边关注全国新闻；做饭时和孩子们聊天，叠衣服时帮他们做作业。我们和伴侣一起出去吃饭，但最后却边吃沙拉边回复短信。总是有那么多事情要做，却从来没有足够的时间去做。
In fact, many of the kids I speak to each week watch their parents being busy and come to an interesting—and discouraging—conclusion: Of all the things their parents do, they sometimes feel like the least important. It’s hard to have a connected, caring conversation with someone who never quite makes eye contact with you.
事实上，许多每周与我聊天的孩子，都看着他们的父母忙得不可开交，并得出一个有趣而又令人沮丧的结论:在他们父母做的所有事情中，他们有时觉得自己是最不重要的。和一个从不和你有眼神交流的人进行交流是很困难的。
Don’t get me wrong: Being busy and working hard isn’t wrong. Research has shown clearly that kids don’t mind that their parents work. In fact, children often express pride in what their parents do and are grateful that parents work hard to keep them safe and comfortable. What children don’t like, the researchers tell us, is when their time with their parents feels rushed, when parents are always glancing at the clock before responding.
不要误解我的意思：忙碌和努力工作并没有错。研究清楚地表明，孩子们不介意父母工作。事实上，孩子们经常为他们的父母所做的事情感到骄傲，并对父母努力让他们过得安全和舒适表示感激。研究人员告诉我们，孩子们不喜欢的是他们和父母在一起的时间，父母依旧感到匆忙，父母总是在做出反应前，瞄一眼时钟。
There’s more, too. It turns out that the human brain is actually not constructed to multitask effectively. If you Google “multitasking and the brain”, you’ll discover numerous studies that show clearly that trying to do several things at once generally means humans do none of them well. You may be able to correct the spelling sheet while cooking dinner, but how often have you burned the vegetables or overcooked the pasta? Or missed the one word your child misspelled? Driving while talking on the phone, even with a hands-free device, causes more accidents than driving without talking. Multitasking at work makes employees less productive. And never setting time aside to simply be with those you love, and to listen patiently without needing to rush off somewhere else, sends unintended messages about your priorities and what matters most to you. It also means that you never get the time you need to rest and recover, to reflect thoughtfully about your life and your goals, and to feel simple gratitude for the blessings you enjoy.
还有很多这样的事情。事实证明，人类的大脑并不能有效地进行多任务处理。如果你用谷歌搜索“大脑多任务处理”，你会发现许多研究清楚地表明，试图同时做几件事通常意味着人类做不好其中任何一件事。
你可以在做饭的时候纠正拼写错误，
但是你有多少次把蔬菜烧焦或者把意大利面煮得太熟了呢?
或者漏掉了你孩子拼错的一个单词?
即使是使用免提设备，边开车边打电话，也比边开车不打电话造成的事故要多。
在工作中同时处理多项任务会降低员工的工作效率。
留出时间和你爱的人在一起，耐心地倾听，而不必急着去别的地方，这样会无意中传达出你的优先事项和对你来说最重要的事情。这也意味着你永远没有时间去休息和恢复，去思考你的生活和你的目标，去感受简单的感激和祝福给你带来的快乐。
Life goes by so quickly. My biggest regret about raising my own son is not the many mistakes I made, or my own less-than-wonderful parenting decisions. I learned something from every one of them. It’s the fact that I didn’t slow down and just enjoy it more often, that the times I decided in favor of throwing the baseball or going for a bike ride over cleaning the bathroom didn’t happen more often. Real relationships require time and space. Take a deep breath, and slow down.
精彩回顾：
温馨提示
本公众号每天早上6：00更新
可识别二维码关注
每天学习10分钟，每天进步一点点
会给您的生活带来惊人改变
感谢您的支持鼓励，我会继续努力的!
文章地址：
用户邮箱：
打赏金额：USDT
点击”去打赏“，即可进行打赏支持本文章哦
